OK so I was reading this forum about "If I knew then what I know now" and it referred to high school. All the stories that I read were about how they didn't enjoy high school as much, and they'd study harder or choose different things to focus on...blah blah blah. I was like... Man! You're bringing me down! I don't know what those fools were talking about, but here was my reply, so you can all enjoy.
I remember thinking about this a couple of times. I don't really have many regrets from High School, I pretty much had a good time. I didn't let it stress me out, but that may be why I didn't get the best grades either. When I went to college I realized how easy I had it in High School, and if I would have just applied myself like 20% more, I would have been a straight A student. But that 20% was being used to have fun, so to me that was worth it.
There were a couple of classes I wished I would have done better in, but only because they were boring to me. Mr. Crooks, Mr. Gray, and Mr. Lord all got mad at me because I would ace the tests, but I didn't turn in all my homework, and they'd all say, "If you'd just turn in your homework, you might have had A's or B's." Maybe I was just arrogant, or whatever back then, but I felt that I was above homework. I hated it. It felt like a waste of my time. My test scores proved that I understood the material, and it wasn't that I was lazy, I just used my time that I should have been doing homework, to hanging out with friends and have fun. Plus I was really involved with a ton of high school activities. Maybe I stretched myself a little too thin, but then again, I didn't regret it.
I loved being a part of most of the plays we did, I loved being a part of a performance choir, I loved planning for the Debate tournaments, and going with Peer Leadership to elementary schools to teach kids. The best part about it was being a Senior and knowing how to work my way out of not being marked absent or tardy in my Social Studies class while hanging out in the Choir room or on stage working on the upcoming play. I really learned how to work it.
So now the real thing for me would be how I was socially in school. I now know that I was pretty intense as a teen -aged boy hopped up on hormones. I was then and still am today, a hopeless romantic. I think I let that get the better of me sometimes, but I also know that I could have been even more confident in myself than I was, and I probably would have had an insane high school experience. My only regret was that I didn't know how to reduce my intensity. I think I intimidated the girls I liked. That's probably why I never got asked to girls pref dances. I came across as a psycho, when really the truth was I just wanted you to hang out with me and give me a chance, you might like me. I hit my peak of intensity when I was in 10th Grade.
I had a huge crush on Amber Neilsen from when we went to Valley Jr. High School, (me and 20 other guys that had a crush on the head cheerleader) and I kept it pretty quiet. The first month of my 10th grade year (wow- I can't believe I'm typing this.) I decided to become her secret admirer. I would write a love note, and it had clues in the letter as to who I was, and I would cut a rose from my grandmother's rose bush and I put the note and the flower on her doorstep. She lived fairly close to me, so I would walk over all dressed in black and drop it off at around Midnight, and then head back home. I had 4 successful nights of keeping my identity a secret, and then the 5th night it all fell apart. Her boyfriend at the time (and I didn't really know if she even had one anyhow) waited in the shadows for me, and as I dropped off the note and started to head home, he jumped out. Wow was I embarrassed! I'm lucky he didn't try to pound me, but I think he might have been a bit afraid of me too. Some strange guy dropping off roses and harmless love notes to your girl, never know what kind of crazy things he's capable of. Well that was the end of that, and it did some damage to my confidence level after that. (This is the first time I've ever told anyone about this, but I also know that it's in the past, so I hope you enjoyed the story.) I used to want to be able to go back and do high school over knowing what I know now, but I stopped wishing for that when I turned 27. After all I survived that period of my life. I understood then, that the only thing you can really do, is live for right now. Those things shaped who I am today. I wouldn't change a thing. Screw going back, I'm enjoying right now!
